charlesadler.com

Adler: Surprise bedfellows

NDP surge could yield new partnership between Tories, Grits

By Charles Adler, QMI Agency

First posted: Friday, April 29, 2011 2:00:00 EDT AM

On the eve of this historic vote, we have enough information to tell us Stephen Harper did an adequate job preaching to the choir.

The choir knows if we don’t have a stable government led by Harper, we will have an unstable economy and possibly a national unity hiccup or two.

The choir got the message.

The problem is nobody outside the church is interested in listening to this pastor.

The choir equals approximately 125 to 130 seats in a 308-seat House of Commons. The challenge is getting 20 to 30 more.

Can Harper get 15 more seats because of the current Liberal-NDP catfight in Ontario?

Perhaps.

But with the Liberals on a political suicide mission in this campaign, it’s possible that many who reliably vote for them may just vote for Jack Layton this time to really, really give the former natural governing party the message to please find a leader who has had the same fixed address for at least five years, in the same community, in the same country — and on the same planet as the rest of us.

Back in the day

That used to be an easy order for the Grits to fill. These days nothing for them is coming easily, not even votes in the community where I first voted, Montreal. Back then, everyone I knew voted Liberal. Pierre Trudeau had his left-wing bias, but on the stuff that mattered to us he was a tower of strength. He was seen as a guy who wouldn’t blink in the face of the duplicitous separatists and wouldn’t shrink from battle against the murderous FLQ. He may have been too left wing on economics and justice. But when it came to national unity, he had balls of steel.

The only Liberal leader who has had a Trudeau-like groin was Jean Chretien. This week, when he was brought out of mothballs to crack off a few jokes, the sad thing for the former great party was that the biggest joke of all was the man Chretien was there to support.

A few years back, he cracked a few standing beside Stephane Dion. There is very little doubt that when the clock strikes 12 on Monday night, the party of Chretien and Trudeau will have struck out, finishing No. 3 for the first time ever. The big question on Tuesday morning will be, how does the Grit family deal with sickly Uncle Grit?

On Tuesday morning, Dr. Stephen Harper must scrub up, then go into the operating room.

The PM needs to find the right scalpel to save Uncle Grit’s life. If he can find a way to give Michael Ignatieff a shred of dignity, he might be able to prevent Ignatieff from seeking revenge by cutting a deal with Jack Layton, making the NDP leader prime minister.

There is a coalition government in Britain today. It was formed by the party that got the most seats with the party that got the third-most. It was formed by the Conservatives and Liberals. Do we still have a British parliamentary system?

Suck it up boys. The country is surely worth it.

Crappy Birthday, Menzoid

 
By The Menzoid

Earlier this month, The Menzoid defied the odds by celebrating yet another birthday. Indeed, like a Timex watch, The Menzoid, a.k.a., the Good Friday Baby, takes a lickin’ and keeps on tickin’.

Regarding birthdays, The Menzoid is of the opinion that once you’re older than 12, birthday parties and even birthday presents are passé.

But even well into adulthood, it is kind of nice to have one’s birthday personally acknowledged (especially by one’s spouse) via a birthday card. And so it is that The Menzoid and Lady Menzoid have a long tradition, like most couples, of giving one and other birthday cards to mark the occasion.

Alas, that changed for the Menzoid this year. Instead of receiving a birthday card, he booted up his computer on his birthday and found a so-called “e-card” awaiting for him from Lady Menzoid.

Yes, an E card. That’s “E” as in “”eek”, “egad”, “excruciating”, “excrement.”

Truth be told, The Menzoid was outraged. In fact, he didn’t even open the e-card until well into the afternoon.

This is what the e-card said:

 

“A simple exercise just for U

Put your right hand on your left shoulder

And the left hand on the right

Now squeeze gently.”

 

(At this point, one is to click on an icon that states “Click Here.”)

Upon doing so, a picture of a golden-coloured animated bear standing beside pastries, presents and candles appears. The bear gyrates and begins hugging itself – a form of physicality that, if undertaken by a real person in public, would likely result in a charge of public indecency.

Then, “poo” bear says: “You just received a BIG HUG from Me! A very happy birthday to you!”

Needless to say, receiving the e-card completely ruined The Menzoid’s birthday. After all, The Menzoid considers himself to be a worthy recipient of a real paper card with a personal inscription. And no, not one of those 99-cent specials bought at some lousy dollar store. We’re talking a $4.95 Carlton or Hallmark card bought at one of those fancy greeting card stores.

But alas, Lady Menzoid’s appreciation of The Menzoid is now apparently so low that a freebie “e-card” is given to the pride of Rich Man’s Hill. Talk about a lazy act of “slackitivism”!

When the Menzoid returned home that night, Lady Menzoid greeted him at the door with a kiss and asked if the e-card had been received. The Menzoid responded thusly: “Yes. What’s for dinner?”

Lady Menzoid looked perplexed and wondered why the Menzoid never bothered to call her during the day to comment on the e-card. Talk about chutzpah.

“Thank you for what?” The Menzoid responded. “That you couldn’t even find the time to go to the corner store and buy me a REAL birthday card?”

Lady Menzoid looked genuinely surprised. “Gee,” she said. “It would seem to me that most people would very much like to be greeted in the morning by a cute little teddy bear giving them a hug.”

Well, not The Menzoid. Especially if “Huggy Bear” is a freebie. After all, the e-card came via 123Grettings.com. That company’s slogan is “Free Greetings for the Planet.” ™

C-H-E-A-P!

So it’s revenge time for The Menzoid. Next week, Lady Menzoid celebrates her birthday. And instead of doing something petty like sending Lady Menzoid an e-card (which would only make The Menzoid a hypocrite), Lady Menzoid is going to receive one of the most elaborate and expensive birthday cards on the market. It’s a pop-up card made by Up With Paper. When unfolded, it depicts a clothesline with laundry on it, with each drying piece of apparel spelling out the words “Happy Birthday.” There’s also a black cat that pops up as well as a washing machine (the appliance will serve as a handy reminder that Lady Menzoid should not forget her household chores.)

The best part: this card cost The Menzoid a whopping $7.95 plus HST. Look, not even a member of the Royal Family is worthy of a card costing $8.98 off the lot.

So, Happy Birthday, Lady Menzoid. And to quote Queen: “In your face with disgrace.”

Oh, and another thing: Bee-dee bee-dee bee-dee bee-dee bee-dee bee-dee…

You’re welcome.

 

 

The Couch Potatoes on the Election

A humourous look at the election courtesy of The Couch Potatoes, Brett Megarry (Adler's Technical Producer) and Jeff Braun, heard Thursday nights on CJOB 68 Winnipeg at 8:05 pm CST.

 

Listen here:

Couch potatoes election feature

 

Iggy skips votes - he doesn’t deserve ours

By CHARLES ADLER, QMI Agency

The visiting-professor horns on the head of the wannabe prime minister were supposed to come off this week.

Liberal partisan spin was that those horns, “unfairly” planted by Liberal opponents, would be pried off by the professor himself during this week’s debates. Sorry Liberal partisans. The professor is getting a failing grade.

To use a little egghead, ivory tower lingo, the central organizing principle of the Liberal argument was unsound.

Liberal shills have never been able to admit the visiting professor label was well earned by the real Michael Ignatieff. It wasn’t the product of right-wing fantasy.

Many card-carrying Liberals did not support Ignatieff when he tried to succeed Paul Martin. Many of them were for Bob Rae despite the fact a majority of Ontario voters either outright loathe Rae or outright dismiss the idea he can ever be trusted to be a responsible guardian of the Ontario or national economy.

Despite all the baggage Rae earned after becoming an accidental premier two decades ago, many Liberals still preferred Rae to Ignatieff because they perceived Ignatieff as someone outside the Canadian mainstream.

They thought of him as a visiting public intellectual, a visiting professor, long before I did my monologues which gave him the name, long before I registered the domain, visitingprofessor.ca, long before the Tory ads messaging the message, “Michael Ignatieff, just visiting.”

Can anyone name any moment in the debate that managed to peel some alien paint from the face of Michael Ignatieff?

When Jack Layton came in from behind and delivered the head shot about Ignatieff’s low-attendance record at House of Commons votes, it shredded the Liberal spin job.

Layton’s line revealed to voters that Ignatieff wasn’t just a visting professor to Canada. Ignatieff is just visiting when it comes to democracy.

Ignatieff’s typical condescending response was he didn’t require any lessons on democracy from Layton. Iggy would be right about that if only Layton had been wrong about his assertion.

Layton offered the data point — there’s that egghead language again, Iggy’s contagious — of 70%. He said Ignatieff missed 70% of the votes and in the real world when someone misses work 70% of the time, he shouldn’t expect a promotion.

And so here’s Jack Layton, who according to the polls is more trusted by John and Mary Canadian Tire than Michael Ignatieff, saying Ignatieff is not prime minister-worthy because the visiting professor doesn’t even want to visit Parliament Hill.

Is Jack Layton wrong?

Everyone agrees it was a great zinger. It can’t be great if it’s not based on the truth.

Liberal Partisans say it’s not true. Their argument is laughable. Iggy did miss most of those votes. But he was trying to beef up his brand with bus tours and his first visits to those quaint little stores with pedestrian coffee and those greasy little things with the holes in the middle that would never be served at the Ignatieff villa in the south of France.

Speaking of public housing, we know the Ignatieffs can’t stand the thought of living at the opposition residence, Stornoway. If he ever did manage to stage a coalition coup and become PM, would he and his wife hold their noses and “slum” it for a while by moving in to 24 Sussex?

Would they at least visit once in a while for the photo ops?

We Always Annoy the Ones We Love

 
 By The Menzoid

Recently, The Menzoid received a fascinating email from John, a loyal member of Adler Nation. The listener remarked how much he loved listening to The Menzoid on Fridays. Well, that’s not quite the full story…

You see, a very important reason why John enjoys listening to The Charles Adler Show on Fridays between 3 and 4 pm Eastern Standard Time is the very sound of The Menzoid’s voice. Evidently the sound of The Menzoid drives John’s wife bonkers.

Apparently, John’s wife detests The Menzoid. She actually gasps when she hears The Menzoid pontificating on, well, anything and everything.

And she really loses it when she hears The Menzoid laugh. The Menzoid’s laughter actually prompts her to scream at John, yelling words to the effect of, “I can’t stand this freaking idiot! Turn it off! Turn it off!”

Doesn’t sound very blissful, does it?

But as Paul Harvey used to say, here’s the REST of the story: John actually takes pleasure in watching his wife go coo-coo for Cocoa Puffs due to the The Menzoid’s laughter.

“I love to see her get so pissed off,” John writes. “It makes me laugh out loud. As soon as (The Menzoid) does one of those goofy giggles, my wife just loses it – and I’m in heaven! Keep up the good work, guys!”

As a certain pointy-eared science officer serving aboard the U.S.S. Enterprise would say: “Fascinating…”

Even so, John’s email resulted in The Menzoid experiencing an epiphany. Namely, there truly is enjoyment to be had in pushing a spouse’s buttons or busting a spouse’s chops or grinding a spouse’s gears.

Indeed, as previously discussed on this show, Lady Menzoid simply cannot bear it when The Menzoid imitates Twiki, the ridiculous robot from the god-awful TV series, Buck Rogers in the 25^th Century.

For those who have forgotten this slice of TV trash, Twiki is the annoying android who prefaces every statement with the run-on phrase: “Bee-Dee Bee-Dee Bee-Dee Bee-Dee Bee-Dee Bee-Dee Bee-Dee…”

Once or twice a week, The Menzoid will resort to Twiki mode for absolutely no reason than to take enjoyment in watching Lady Menzoid lose it. Thus, instead of a simple, “What’s for dinner, Loryn?” she is asked: “Bee-Dee Bee-Dee Bee-Dee Bee-Dee Bee-Dee Bee-Dee – What’s for duh- duh-duh dinner, Loryn? Bee-Dee Bee-Dee Bee-Dee Bee-Dee Bee-Dee Bee-Dee Bee-Dee Bee-Dee…”

Lady Menzoid sometimes gets so stressed out by the “Bee-Dee Bee-Dee” routine she’ll actually drop a plate on the floor or even throw a saucer at the wall. But you know what? The cost of replacing the occasional piece of china is worth it just to witness Lady Menzoid experience her own personal China Syndrome due the sonic torture of Twiki.

Yet, a question for the ages arises: why do we take such pleasure in annoying the ones we love? This is the query The Menzoid asked renowned psychiatrist, Doctor Gordon Baker.

The Doc said it basically boils down to generating a “pure, emotional response” from the person being tormented.

“It [being annoying] is like going back to a certain stage of childhood. It’s all about taking off the disguise of adulthood and ‘getting real’ as the saying goes.”

Doctor Baker notes the reason the recent leaders’ debate was so soul-destroying and boring to so many viewers was due to the conversations being “so wooden, so scripted… so fake.”

However, there’s something inherently appealing when somebody drops the “masks of polite society.” Granted, such “masks” are essential for maintaining civility and manners and etiquette. But sometimes it is passion, not politeness, that is needed.

Says the Shrink: “By doing something purposefully annoying to somebody and then getting to watch that person seethe, it’s almost like watching the truth literally leak out of a person… I think the person doing the annoying loves the sheer spontaneity of such an emotional response.”

And the Doc practices what he preaches noting that he purposefully annoys his wife “all the time.”

So there you have it folks. Just like John, The Menzoid, and Doc Baker, go ahead and annoy those you love. And take comfort that in doing so you’re simply trying to illicit a degree of unabashed honesty in a world brimming with trumped-up fakery.

You’re welcome.

 

Will the Real Member of Parliament for Oak Ridges-Markham Please Stand Up?

 

By The Menzoid

I feel profoundly sorry for Lui Temelkovski.

You see, amnesia is a terrible burden for anyone to bear. And poor Lui might be having some problems remembering certain things. For example, Lui apparently believes he’s the sitting Member of Parliament for The Menzoid’s riding of Oak Ridges-Markham.

Hey, don’t take The Menzoid’s word for it: just check out Lui’s election signs. The ruby red placards bear Lui’s name, his party affiliation (Liberal), and up in the top left-hand corner, a hyphenated word reading “Re-Elect.”

Oops. Just one teeny-weeny, itsy-bitsy problem with that little “Re-Elect” slogan ... Lui actually is NOT the sitting MP for Oak Ridges-Markham. That honour belongs to Paul Calandra of the Conservatives. Again, you can look it up: Mr. Calandra won the riding in 2008.

So it is that those passing through Oak-Ridges-Markham are gazing upon a whopper of a mixed message given that the red signs say “Re-Elect Lui Temelkovski” and the blue ones say “Re-Elect Paul Calandra.”

Maybe people think Oak Ridges-Markham is an entirely unique riding wherein two – count ’em – two MPs are serving the constituency? Wow! Talk about your distinct societies…

Alas, with all due respect, “L” is for Liberal and “L” is for Lui and “L” is for “loser”. And although the words may sting, The Menzoid fears poor Lui is quite the sore loser.

For starters, Lui lost the Oak Ridges-Markham riding three years ago by just 545 votes. So the logistics are brutally simple here: Lui simply cannot be re-elected in 2011 given that he failed to get re-elected in 2008. Period.

As you can imagine, Lui has enraged many constituents over his blatantly false advertising campaign. And in response to his critics, the PR spin cycle generated by Lui resembles that of a Maytag washer being powered by a nuclear reactor.

Excuse Number One: Lui says he is not a rich man. He simply cannot afford to replace those old “Re-Elect” signs he’s planted on vacant lots all over Oak Ridges-Markham, so cut him some slack, will ya?

Excuse Number Two: Cue the Green Shaft. You see, Lui says that to send his old, inaccurate election signs to the landfill dump just because the information on those signs is past the best-before date would be environmentally unfriendly. Therefore, he’s embracing recycling so as not to harm good ol’ Mother Earth. One can almost imagine Elizabeth May getting misty-eyed hearing Lui’s green altruism.

But folks, just for the sake of argument, let’s just say that Lui Temelkovski truly is cash-poor and he likes being an environmental champion. Well, how does one explain his email address? Which reads: RE-ELECT LUI AT GMAIL DOT COM? Or his campaign website address, which reads: WWW DOT RE-ELECT LUI DOT COM?

So much for the poverty and environment angles!

Of course, there is an environmentally-responsible and low-cost solution to Lui’s false signs: stickers. If Lui wanted to do the right thing from a cost perspective and an environmental perspective and – yes! – an ETHICAL perspective, Lui could simply cover-up the contentious “re-elect” language with low-cost stickers. Problem solved.  When The Menzoid spoke to Mr. Temelkovski yesterday, he said he is indeed responding to criticism by embarking on a sticker campaign, covering up “Re-Elect” with “Bring Back.” Yet, judging by the number of “Re-Elect Lui Temelkovski” signs still peppering the riding, it would appear that the cover-up campaign is moving about as fast as molasses going uphill in wintertime.

And The Menzoid hates to be a stickler for details, but Lui’s email and website coordinates still contain that pesky “Re-Elect” word. So it would appear that Lui would rather cling to misinformation… or he’s suffering from amnesia.

Yet, in a way, the constituents of Oak Ridges-Markham owe Lui a giant thank you. Because this particular Fiberal is doing everyone a favour. You see, lies galore are verbally tossed around out on the hustings like so much confetti at a royal wedding. But Lui Temelkovski has gone one step further: he has put his falsehoods in writing for all to see via his signs, his website, and his email address.

The irony is profound: Lui Temelkovski is being completely honest about his dishonesty.

Who’d have thunk it?

The incredible Albert Pujols

His big bat has made the St. Louis Cardinals' slugger one of the top 10 players in baseball history. But to people with Down syndrome and the poor of his native Dominican Republic that he helps, he means a lot more than home runs and RBI. Bob Simon reports on 60 Minutes.

Click HERE to watch.

Plan to vote Liberal?

If you do, read this first. See what kind of man Iggy is standing by

By CHARLES ADLER, QMI Agency 

I am about to give you a quiz of sorts that will not take you more than a minute to decide whether you’re a Canadian conservative or something else. Unlike the CBC and their silly poll, we want to respect both your mind and your time.

Here’s the quiz in the form of a transcript from an interview my Corus Calgary colleague Dave Rutherford did with a Liberal candidate in the Alberta riding of Wild Rose, a former provincial judge. John Reilly has received the blessing of Michael Ignatieff, despite having seen what you are about to see right now.

===

Rutherford: You shouldn’t go to jail for a sex assault?

Reilly: Well, you know, there are sexual assaults and there are sexual assaults.

Rutherford: Sure?

Reilly: And I had another young man, not a young offender, but a 19, 20-year-old. He’s at a party, there’s a lot of sexual innuendo, one of these women is being very aggressive with her boyfriend and they’re drinking a lot, the boyfriend passes out, she goes, gets into bed naked, he goes up, he’s thinking he’s going to be able to, that she’ll probably agree to have sex with him, he fondles her privates, and she wakes up and tells him to go away, and he goes away.

They report it, he’s charged with (a) sexual offence, he has digitally penetrated her, the Crown prosecutor says this is a digital penetration of a woman’s vagina, he should go to jail for three years, that’s the starting point for this sexual offence.

And I’m looking at this 20-year-old, socially inept young man, and his offence is a sexual assault and it’s one that they consider a major sexual assault because it involves digital penetration. I don’t think in those circumstances that what happened there should put that young man in a penitentiary for three years.

Rutherford: Unless it’s your daughter, and then maybe you’ve got a whole other perspective! You haven’t mentioned the word “victim” once yet!

Reilly: You know, I am concerned about victims, but what I’m concerned about is our society as a whole.

===

There now. Wasn’t that easy? And it only took a minute of your precious time. Ignatieff’s response to the transcript was that he was offended by it, but not nearly offended enough to toss Reilly under the Liberal bus. He remains a candidate, but has since apologized.

If you’re comfortable with the Liberal leader’s judgment, mark yourself down as an Ignatieff Liberal. Now you might be an NDPer. But what you are not is a conservative. I can tell you that without the assistance of CBC-friendly professors.

If you think the judgment of Ignatieff in putting his Liberal stamp on the former judge is more important than who does or doesn’t attend a Stephen Harper rally, you’re very likely a Conservative voter. Hope I’ve been more respectful of your time than the CBC.

Good luck in the debate on Tuesday, Mr. Ignatieff. We know the modern-day Liberal idea of justice disrespects victims and their families. That’s clear to those who have been paying attention to how Liberals vote in the Commons and the Senate.

They tend to say what the judge said in the Corus Radio interview. Liberals are more concerned about society as a whole. Conservative voters are also concerned, very concerned.

We've Become a Nation of Takers, Not Makers

By STEPHEN MOORE - Wall Street Journal

If you want to understand better why so many states—from New York to Wisconsin to California—are teetering on the brink of bankruptcy, consider this depressing statistic: Today in America there are nearly twice as many people working for the government (22.5 million) than in all of manufacturing (11.5 million). This is an almost exact reversal of the situation in 1960, when there were 15 million workers in manufacturing and 8.7 million collecting a paycheck from the government.

It gets worse. More Americans work for the government than work in construction, farming, fishing, forestry, manufacturing, mining and utilities combined. We have moved decisively from a nation of makers to a nation of takers. Nearly half of the $2.2 trillion cost of state and local governments is the $1 trillion-a-year tab for pay and benefits of state and local employees. Is it any wonder that so many states and cities cannot pay their bills?

Every state in America today except for two—Indiana and Wisconsin—has more government workers on the payroll than people manufacturing industrial goods. Consider California, which has the highest budget deficit in the history of the states. The not-so Golden State now has an incredible 2.4 million government employees—twice as many as people at work in manufacturing. New Jersey has just under two-and-a-half as many government employees as manufacturers. Florida's ratio is more than 3 to 1. So is New York's.

Even Michigan, at one time the auto capital of the world, and Pennsylvania, once the steel capital, have more government bureaucrats than people making things. The leaders in government hiring are Wyoming and New Mexico, which have hired more than six government workers for every manufacturing worker.

Now it is certainly true that many states have not typically been home to traditional manufacturing operations. Iowa and Nebraska are farm states, for example. But in those states, there are at least five times more government workers than farmers. West Virginia is the mining capital of the world, yet it has at least three times more government workers than miners. New York is the financial capital of the world—at least for now. That sector employs roughly 670,000 New Yorkers. That's less than half of the state's 1.48 million government employees.

Don't expect a reversal of this trend anytime soon. Surveys of college graduates are finding that more and more of our top minds want to work for the government. Why? Because in recent years only government agencies have been hiring, and because the offer of near lifetime security is highly valued in these times of economic turbulence. When 23-year-olds aren't willing to take career risks, we have a real problem on our hands. Sadly, we could end up with a generation of Americans who want to work at the Department of Motor Vehicles.

The employment trends described here are explained in part by hugely beneficial productivity improvements in such traditional industries as farming, manufacturing, financial services and telecommunications. These produce far more output per worker than in the past. The typical farmer, for example, is today at least three times more productive than in 1950.

Where are the productivity gains in government? Consider a core function of state and local governments: schools. Over the period 1970-2005, school spending per pupil, adjusted for inflation, doubled, while standardized achievement test scores were flat. Over roughly that same time period, public-school employment doubled per student, according to a study by researchers at the University of Washington. That is what economists call negative productivity.

But education is an industry where we measure performance backwards: We gauge school performance not by outputs, but by inputs. If quality falls, we say we didn't pay teachers enough or we need smaller class sizes or newer schools. If education had undergone the same productivity revolution that manufacturing has, we would have half as many educators, smaller school budgets, and higher graduation rates and test scores.

The same is true of almost all other government services. Mass transit spends more and more every year and yet a much smaller share of Americans use trains and buses today than in past decades. One way that private companies spur productivity is by firing underperforming employees and rewarding excellence. In government employment, tenure for teachers and near lifetime employment for other civil servants shields workers from this basic system of reward and punishment. It is a system that breeds mediocrity, which is what we've gotten.

Most reasonable steps to restrain public-sector employment costs are smothered by the unions. Study after study has shown that states and cities could shave 20% to 40% off the cost of many services—fire fighting, public transportation, garbage collection, administrative functions, even prison operations—through competitive contracting to private providers. But unions have blocked many of those efforts. Public employees maintain that they are underpaid relative to equally qualified private-sector workers, yet they are deathly afraid of competitive bidding for government services.

President Obama says we have to retool our economy to "win the future." The only way to do that is to grow the economy that makes things, not the sector that takes things.

Campaign-trail frowns could burn Harper

By CHARLES ADLER, QMI Agency

The Canadian dollar is rising. The Canadian economy is humming. Job creation is happening virtually everywhere.

You would think this is a time when the prime minister of such a fortunate country would be a happy warrior, above the parochial fray and well on his way to a very big victory on May 2.

But when you see the PM these days on the campaign trail, he looks tired and irritable. When you see his chief opponent, he looks like he is having the time of his life. This isn't some namby-pamby, lefty spin job. I am simply doing my job, telling the truth to people who are reading the words of someone who did the CBC compass test and was officially declared conservative.

I am not saying the sky is falling for the Conservatives because the prime minister is looking like he needs a good night's sleep and/or a bottle of happy pills. But there is one fact of life in the age of TV campaigns, as shown a half-century ago during the Kennedy-Nixon debates. Voters listen with their eyes. If they see a knight in shining armour brimming with confidence, they tend to react positively.

Michael Ignatieff may not be anywhere close to the second coming of John F. Kennedy. Stephen Harper may not be the man Oliver Stone would ever cast as Nixon. But three facts are clear:

1) Harper is presiding over a successful economy in troubled times. That's a car you don't have to sell. You just have to put it in the showroom and online and then stand beside her.

2) From now until May 2, Harper has every reason to congratulate the Canadian people for performing like troopers and creating robust economic growth. In doing so, ordinary Canadians fought the headwinds created by doom merchants like the PM's political opponents and many members of the media, including some in the business media.

3) Harper has every reason to be happy about the country's great accomplishments since he became prime minister. For anyone who doubts how well this country is doing, take a quick trip to Florida, California, Arizona or Nevada and ask anyone if the price of their home is worth much more today than it was a decade ago. While many middle-class people in the U.S. have lost a decade in family-wealth creation, Canadian families have prospered. As they say in some parts of the U.S., "It ain't braggin' if you can do it." Canada has earned its bragging rights.

When John and Mary Canadian Tire watch the prime minister on the tube for the next four weeks, they should be seeing a happy and proud papa. He should be looking like a young father whose kid just scored the winning goal in the most important game of the season.

Stephen Harper needs to step up his game right now. His loyal supporters are counting on it. If the PM doesn't get happy in a hurry, his coalition nightmare could become a self-fulfilling prophecy.